Spring Break Jump-off Pajama Party
So pajama parties aren't what they used to be. When I was in high school, a pajama party meant a night with the girls, watching 80s movies and eating ice cream and cookies late at night (mmm... ice cream...). No more. A pajama party is now an excuse for teenagers to exercise their insane little hormones while experimenting sexually with multiple partners.
Here's where the story begins--the other day, I saw my students passing around a flier for a party on the Friday of Spring Break. I'd heard some talk of this throughout the classroom, and so I was curious and asked to see the flier. Of course, my students were all like, "oh, you gonna go too, Ms. Furlong? You want to go to the jump-off party?" In my maturity, I ignored them and just took the flier, which turned out to be a bit shocking, to say the least.
Let me explain. The top of the flier stated "Spring Break Pajama Jump-off Party". Now, upon initial examination, one might think that a "Jump-off" party is just a party that starts off Spring Break with a bang. But, for those out there who aren't up on current lingo, a "Jump-off" is a girl that allows guys to jump on her and then jump right back off--a sort of modern day slut, if you will. Add the pajama in there, and it seems like a teenage male's testosterone heaven.
In addition, the flier had some other interesting notables--to one side, it said, "Girls, dress sexy" (hmm... I don't know where the girls parents are who are letting them go to a co-ed pajama slut party dressed "sexy") and to the other side, it said, "Fellas, don't start no sh!t." Literally, that's what it said. Oh, and just in case you're wondering, there was a discount on admission if you were scantily clad. Awesome.
I know that it's naive to think that these kids are anywhere as innocent as I was as a freshman in high school, but at the same time, why is it OK for girls to be sex objects at such a young age? What makes it OK for boys to objectivity these young women? How can a woman command respect from a man when she's going to a "Jump-off" party?
Kids will be kids, but that doesn't mean they can be kids without self-respect.
I stood in the way of high school love...
Today my students were talking in class. They were laughing, and I
was annoyed because I was trying to teach them the Oddyssey, which is
NOT an easy read (and if I don't even like it that much as a college
graduate with an English degree, these 14 year olds must be straight
up hatin'). After a long period of consistent disruptions, I saw a
note being passed and, assuming it was something negative about either
my inability to teach effectively or my big ass, I immediately
assigned the three students who were so chatty a detention. And, so
as not to embarrass myself, I put the note in my podium and decided to
read it later.
After class and after the 3 disenchanted students (angry now at their
"unfair" detention assignment) had left, I picked up the note. Here's
what it said:
"Brittany,
Can I Be Your Lover and Boyfriend
Yes No
Corey
Write Back"
So, now I feel guilty for standing in the way of love. Poor little
kid was just trying to get a woman and make a name for hisself. And
the other kids were laughing at him.
HAHAHAHAHA...
And another funny story... I have a kid in my 6th period class who is
a self proclaimed "pimp": He comes to class each day insisting that's
he's "pimpin'" it (but, here's reality: those suits he sports every
day in school don't seem to be evidence to support his "pimpin"
argument). It's cute and all, but when he starts playin his "pimp
music" (ie, Christina Milan and Beyonce) all up in the middle of
class, it gets annoying. But, I digress. So, the other day Carlton
(that's what we'll call him) asks to go to the bathroom. I told him
yes, but was surprised to see no movement from him after that. So, a
few minutes pass and and he asks from his desk (at the back of class),
"Ms Furlong, ain't you supposed to be writing me a pass?" I say to
him, "Carlton, aren't you supposed to be walking up here to get it?"
His response was, "Ms Furlong, you can't talk to me like that--I'm a
PIMP." I, of course, being the ever-calm teacher that I am,
maintained my cool, but inside I was cracking my ass up.
Heehee...
Why don't I ever get any "yes or no" notes? Ehh... high school kids,
they grow on you.
Oh, yes, and in case any of you were wondering, I am working on
becoming 100% ghetto-fabulous. My students have promised to make me
cool by the end of the year, so that I'll stop saying things like,
"woo-hoo" and start saying things like, "off the chain."
My First Day
Today--I won't lie--was horrendous. It was completely overwhelming.
I have stepped into a position teaching over 120 freshman and seniors
who have had little to no discipline thoughout the year. When I
walked in today, as the first teacher who has stood her ground with
these kids since the beginning of the school year, they were NOT
pleased. I'm sure that most of them probably think I'm the biggest
bitch they've ever met. But, the staff is incredible and supportive
and have welcomed me with completely open arms. Teachers who aren't
in my department were stopping me to say welcome and to offer support
(perhaps just because they had an idea of the kind of brats I would be
teaching and felt bad for me--haha, just kiddin). Anyways, so I'm
incredibly excited (although, I won't lie--I think I thought to myself
"what have I gotten myself into?!" about 50 times today), but I know
that the next few months--especially the first couple of weeks--will
be some of the hardest weeks of my life. I just have to think, "long
term rewards, long term rewards...."
So, here's a few lessons learned from Day One as "El Teacherundo"
(that's Spanish for "the best teacher of all time". It's true--look
it up):
1. Don't let kids out of the classroom on your first day of
teaching. Even if they threaten to pee their pants, tell their mom on
you, and ask things like, "what happens if my bladder bursts?" (To
this question, the correct reply is, "We'll just have to wait and see
when it happens" One kid--when I said that today--said, "Does it
hurt?" I replied, "I don't know--my bladder has never burst")
2. Sometimes the kids aren't lying when they say they have to leave
class 10 minutes early to catch a bus to go to their other high
school. What's funny, though, is not believing them, holding them
until the bell rings, and then actually having the bus leave without
them. Tee-hee... my baaaad...
3. When asked if you have a boyfriend, the best response is, "You've
only known me for 30 minutes--I'm not going to tell you that." Of
course, when they reply, "Our old teacher told us all about her
personal life, how she met her boyfriend in a chat room and the first
time they talked they talked for 3 hours and she wanted to marry him,"
it's OK to giggle. Just do it on the inside.
Wow. Hmm... yeah, when I think about it, today was a bit humorous after all.
